Every single day is a different day.
Days of joy or sadness.
Days of fear or confidence.
Days of stability or anxiety.
And then there are some days where I experience Mommy guilt.
There came a time in my life where I had dreams of my own to be a successful and popular singer or to be a workaholic in corporate america and climb to the top of the ladder.
Everything changed when I gave birth to my beautiful girl, Charlotte Luz.
My perspective on life and the world did a complete 360. I no longer was living for myself; instead I was living to make sure my daughter will be guided and cared for throughout this thing called life.
I told myself, “I’m going to be the best mom ever”!
Mommy guilt kicks in when…..
I was so grateful for maternity leave! Yes, 3 months with my baby – awesome! Time to bond with my baby and time devoted to only us. Those 3 months were definitely not enough. In fact, those 3 months flew by in the blink of an eye. I was so sad to go back to work, but it was necessary. Mommy guilt kicks in.
Alright, my work now believes in work-life balance and offers work at home options. Yes – awesome! I get to work at home and spend time with Charlie. However, I have to be online 9-5 and spend time away from my daughter because I’m busy coming up with a solution or in a webex actively discussing various projects to prove I was deserving of a promotion. Mommy guilt kicks in.
I’m out for my friend’s birthday dinner. We are all laughing at how times have changed with all the new babies joining our friend circle. I take a picture of our dinner spread and flip through yesterday’s pictures of Charlie. Oh man for some reason, yup you guessed it, Mommy guilt kicks in. Wishing Charlie was with me cuz I missed her so much!
Ryan (husband) has been back and forth from different projects traveling to and from Hawaii or Boston. We decide to take a weekend trip alone to New York. We go out, we have fun, and then for some reason I see babies every where we turn! Ugh…. Mommy guilt decides to show up. We kept saying, “Man, we should have brought Charlie with us! This would have been a great Instagram picture”.
There are times when I feel Mommy guilt, however I think that this feeling is normal and part of motherhood. Feeling Mommy guilt just means that we love our children and want the absolute best for them.
No matter what your occupation is – work at home mom, stay at home mom, or full time working mom, we are all mothers.
And, I truly believe finding b a l a n c e with your different hats in your life (mom, wife, employee, friend, etc.) overcomes all the times you feel Mommy guilt. Finding time for everything that makes you who you are and also finding time to spend with your children consistently every day is key. Finding this balance helps you be the best version of you, and therefore helps you be a better mother. Who you are and what you portray to your children impacts their development and success in this world. Can I get an ah-hah moment y’all?
How do you balance all your different hats? How do you deal with your Mommy guilt?! Comment below!
Until next time Mamas!